Lu, one of your favorite sayings as an adult is, “dead to me.” Someone did something shitty? They are so #deadtoyou. Walking away from things you care about or people you love is an extremely hard thing to do. But learning how to remove people who don’t add value to your life or reciprocate the same respect you bestow upon them is essential. You can spend your life investing in relationships that don’t fulfill you, but the only person you’re hurting in the end is yourself.

But you want to prove them ALL wrong? You want to win everyone over. You are fucking fabulous and you want the whole world to know. A battle every person ON THIS PLANET struggles with is wanting to be the exception. We want to be the one person that the bitchy boss promotes or the one girl to change a player into a loving and dotting boyfriend. Here’s the deal.

We always want to be the exception BUT you should be your own exception. You can’t control how other people feel or what other people think. BUT, you can control how people treat you. If you accept shitty behavior from people, they don’t just wake up one day and see the light (shocking, I know). Do you know what they do? They just continue to treat you like shit. We want to give people the benefit of the doubt. But, let me let you in on a secret Lu, everyone is obsessed with their own lives. It’s very rare for a selfish person to even beware or care about their shitty behavior (they are too caught up in their own stuff to care or will find other people to put up with their crap).You’re a person who loves to analyze everything. You want to run through every fucking detail of every situation and get to the bottom of it. You want to figure out the intent behind every action. But here’s the truth- you are never going to truly know what anyone thinks. No one is going to give you some secret key to read someone’s mind. You can sit and talk to your girlfriends or family about a shitty person or situation for hours, but in the end the only thing you are doing is wasting YOUR time.

It’s easy to hold on to things or people that don’t serve us because it’s scary to face being alone or accepting something’s over. It’s easier to invest energy into bad situations and people than to take a look at the mirror and see what drove you to tolerate bad behavior. Personally, I love to hold on to things. But, in your 20’s you will learn how to let go and move on. You show people how to treat you. Sometimes that means kicking people to the curb (you have to be ok with that). Being “dead to you” doesn’t mean you let go of the memories you share with people but it does mean you let go of situations or people that don’t serve you. I promise you, you have found so much more happiness by investing in yourself. Remember to always kick the haters and losers to the curb because those bitches are #deadtoyou and you are too fucking fabulous for anything less than amazing.